I don’t ever intentionally set out to sabotage myself (I’m just really good at it)…

One of my biggest obstacles as a would-be-scribe is just life itself.

I have two jobs, five kids, and a wife with her own noble persuits. With all of this comes the obligations of cooking, (some) cleaning, laundry, shuttling kids back and forth, and all that other mother jazz. As a result, I end up doing a lot of “stop and go” writing; I can only squeeze in writing at certain times and sometimes goes days, if not weeks, in between writing sessions. It’s hard to get a good flow going this way and I think that is probably also a primary factor in my often suffering from writer’s block.

I will hit a good stride and bust out a good bunch of work and think I’ve broken the roadblock. Several days later I get the opportunity to sit down and write again and sometimes forget the little details that I’d set out for myself in the last day’s work. I try to write myself notes and generally remember where I want to go next,  but the flow of the work suffers. For example, I started this book about ten months ago. I’m pretty sure I wrote my entire last book in this same block of time while right now I’m thinking I’m maybe two thirds through this one. Is this book any longer than the last, not necessarily (not that I can tell either), but I do know that I’m struggling more with the process on this one because I am suffering more of my “stop-and-go” spells this time.

Every now and then I also start to panic and think that I’ve taken this book as far as it will go, even though I have some of the climax worked out mentally and know where it will (most likely) end. That thought more than anything scares the hell out of me. I’m over one hundred hand written pages in, I’ve dedicated some time to research, I’ve isolated myself from my family for hours at a time to work on it. I owe it to myself and to them to finish it out.

At the very least, I’m not thinking about a new project and distracting myself. But, then again, maybe I do need to start thinking of the next project to help drive me to finish this one so I can start the next?

Maybe I just need to shut up, turn off the computer, and get to damn work and quit bitching…

On a happier note, a new short story will be available for Kindle this evening.  Three people have read it so far and confirmed that it doesn’t suck (my words, not theirs).

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