Words, I like to..write..into sentences…and stuff…

Writer’s block is not a rare problem for me.  I often bitch on the facebook and the twitter and on here about having difficulty finding the words to put to paper.  Most of the time, it’s in the middle of the project and I get frustrated because I know where or how I want the story to go but I can’t actually pull the trigger.

This last bout was different.

I was able to bust through my sci-fi/noir novel last week and actually finished the bad mamma jamma on Friday.  It was a wonderful feeling.  I was giddy and screaming with joy and bouncing around the house like I was my three year old daughter after being told she could have ice cream.  A great weight was lifted from my shoulders.  It was like breaking us with a selfish lover who was fun to fool around with but eventually going to bed with her felt more like work.

So now my docket is empty.  That becomes its own problem by itself.  When I finished Time With His Fools last year, I’d already had the wheels spinning on the as yet untitled sci fi noir book.  I’d already started some preliminary research, created the core characters, drawn a flow chart, etc.  With all of that figured out, I was able to sit down and start flying almost immediately.  In a way, it was as though I was 3o pages in before I even got started.

Then there was Friday.  I panicked a little bit after I finished because I had no idea where to go next.  I’ve got one book, a follow up to Our Own Devils, that I’ve had on the backburner for maybe two years now.  I was maybe a third to halfway through it when I decided to shelve it in favor of doing a small re-write on Devils before putting it on Amazon.com and then writing Fools.  Obviously I’d go back to that one, right?

Nah, don’t feel like it.  I already know it needs a re-write before I even finish it and it’s a bit disheartening so I’m staying away from it.  Well, for now anyway; it’s one of those books that I often think about and still know where I wanted it to go and how I wanted it to end.

But I didn’t have anything else on tap, either. 

Through the entire weekend I felt that I was suffering from a creative paralysis.  I finally settled on something that has been on the backburner even longer than the Devils follow up; the story that started it all with the characters of Mac and Alex: The Darkling Plain.

Is the title awful? I don’t think so, it’s a quote from a poet whose name I cannot remember and it’s a quote that I cannot even entirely remember.  I’ll worry about that later because the internet is a great source to reclaim old inspiration.  It’s the book where Mac and Alex first met.  I started it when I was 20 and muddled through it for 3 years.  As a result, I know there were probably some fractured ideas that weren’t properly followed through and were too terribly influenced by a 20 year old who watched way too many Shane Black films.

That said, I now have a plan again.  It feels good.  I have something to focus on and something to think about in those waning moments before I drift off to sleep at night.  I’m going to come at it kind of fresh, too.  Instead of attacking it with the old manuscript in front of me, I’m going to start it off from memory and try to take it into a better direction.

(gulp)

Here we go…

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